Nothing made me feel better when I was having a really bad time while growing up like listening to songs that made me either feel that there was someone else out there that was worse off than what I was at that time. I never reached that point of wanting to cash it all in. Listening to songs like this made me realize how much I enjoyed living regardless of the struggling situations and hardships in which I found myself growing up.  Thanks to all the Metal and Punk bands out there that helped me through the rough patches. There were a lot. Suicyco For Life!!!

How Will I Laugh Tomorrow (When I Can’t Even Smile Today)

Here I sit and watch my world come crumbling down
I cry for help but no one’s around
Silently screaming as I bang my head against the wall
It seems like no one cares at all

Always an emotion, but how can I explain; how can I explain?
Kind of like the scent of a rose, with words I can’t explain, the same with my pain
Caught up in emotion, goes over my head; goes over my head!
Sometimes I got to think to myself is this life or death, am I living or am I dead

The clock keeps ticking, but nothing else seems to change
Problems never solved, just rearranged
And when I think about all the times that I’ve had
Some were good most were bad

I search for personality and I look for things I cannot see
Love and peace flash through my mind; pain and hate is all I find
Find no hope in nothing new and I never had a dream come true
Lies and hate and agony; through my eyes that’s all I see

If I’m gonna cry, will you wipe away my tears?
And if I’m gonna die, Lord please take away my fear
Before I drown in sorrow, I just want to say;
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today

Today today; when I can’t even smile today
Today today; when I can’t even smile today
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today

You think it’s so funny…
…laugh at this!

So when I look outside my room
I see the world, but not the reason
What is done to me is not fair
You call it fair I call it treason
But I don’t know what to do
Give me a sign I’ll take whatever
But if you want me here I am
Ain’t gonna die forever

And I tried to hold ya
But you just turned away
And I tried to tell ya
But not a word I say
I cried out so loudly
But you just covered your ears
And gave me all the signs
That you don’t want my tears

So if you want me here I am
I sit and wait your decision
But my body fights my mind
I headed straight for a collision
So am I getting near or am I still
Looking in all the wrong places
But the only thing that seems to change
Are the looks on the faces…

Doesn’t anyone…seems like no one cares at all
I search for personality and look for things I cannot see
Does anyone even care at all?
Love and peace flash through my mind; pain and hate is all I find
Seems like no one cares at all
Find no hope in nothing new and I never had a dream come true
Does anyone even care at all?
Lies and hate and agony; through my eyes that’s all I see
Seems like no one cares at all

How will I laugh tomorrow?
How will I laugh tomorrow?
How will I laugh tomorrow?
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today

Today today; when I can’t even smile today
Today today; when I can’t even smile today
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today
How will I laugh tomorrow, when I can’t even smile today…